How to overcome low self-esteem?
Here there are 36 ways to overcome low self-esteem:
1. Graph Your Days
Graphing your days is a great way to get an idea about your self-esteem.
Every day before bed, get a bit of paper and graph your day from the time you rise up until you attend bed. If part of the day was good, make your graph higher accordingly.
If part of your day was bad, make your graph lower. This can give you a pretty good idea of how you view your world.
2. List Good Qualities
Getting a bit of paper and listing all of your good qualities may be a great way to raise your self-esteem. It may be tough at first, but as you start
acknowledging that you have some good qualities, you’ll be on your way to feeling better about yourself.
Start thinking positive. Rather than playing the “what if” game, thinking of bad things that could happen, start thinking of good things that could happen. When not-so-great things do happen, attempt to consider a positive spin on it.
4.Stop Comparing Yourself To Others
One of the foremost self-destructive belongings you can do is compare yourself to others. the sole person you ought to compare yourself to is you. This is important because you need to have a clear view of your own talents and abilities.
5.Stop Putting Yourself Down
How many times have you ever thought to yourself, “I’m so stupid,” or “I
never do anything right”? This kind of self-talk is very self-destructive.
Try to make a conscious effort each day to add positive self-talk to your thinking.
Use Positive Affirmations
When life gets tough, it’s great to seek advice from others around you. But perhaps the best person who can counsel you is you. For many people, the natural way to relieve anxiety is to engage in some
But it is the way you speak to yourself during this pep talk that makes a real difference.
There is a two-pronged approach to this. First, think positive thoughts and pair them up with positive affirmations. Second, remove any negative thoughts holding you down.
Many of your emotions get determined by the way you talk to yourself throughout the day. If you don’t deliberately and consciously talk to yourself in a positive manner, you’ll start thinking about the things that make you unhappy, lower your
confidence, and cause you to worry.
Most people have these automatic thinking patterns that are negative. Sometimes, these
negatives become so deep-rooted that it can be hard to change them without awareness and effort.
There is little doubt that using positive affirmations harnesses positive thinking.
Positive statements that you repeat to yourself
can help you challenge and overcome self-sabotaging negative
thoughts. If you feel skeptical about using positive affirmations just think about it another way. Just as regular exercise helps improve your physical health, positive affirmations can do the same for your mind and outlook.
When you keep telling yourself that you can do something and do it well, it will keep you motivated and boost your confidence.
Some research also shows that when you use positive affirmations while goal setting, they become more effective.
Identify areas where you need affirmations such as feeling and looking more confident and make them compatible with your core values. Finding those that resonate with you will be the most effective.
The power of affirmations lies in repetition. Recite these daily when you need a boost or when you engage in negative thoughts.
While these may not help you forget your shortcomings, or erase toxically influences from your life, they will help you dwell less on the negative and focus more on the positive.
The reason why it’s important to remove negative thoughts is that too many of these can easily become self-fulfilling prophecies.
When you talk yourself into believing that you’re not good enough, these thoughts drag you down and keep you anchored there.
Use affirmations to turn such negatives into positives. When negative self-talk makes you struggle, choose an affirmation that is the opposite of that thought or belief, and put that into practice.
The most common way of practicing positive affirmations is in front of the mirror. While this may seem silly at first, you do
establish a visual and psychological connection with yourself when doing so.
By looking yourself in the eye and telling yourself you can do something, you create a stronger belief in that thought.
Experts will tell you that you need to feel the affirmation and not simply say it. This adds weights to your affirmation and makes it more effective.
7. Accept Compliments
A person with low self-esteem finds it very hard to accept compliments.
Practice saying “thank you” in the mirror. Learning to accept compliments sincerely will start you on the road to higher self-esteem.
8. Be Around Positive People
If you surround yourself with negative people, then likelihood is that you’ll also be a negative person. It’s important that you’re around positive people
so that you’ll start to think more positively about your life as well.
Many people with low self-esteem think that they don’t deserve to have their needs met. This is absolutely not true. The sooner you start voicing
your needs, the sooner you will feel like a worthwhile person.
10. Compliment Others
A big step in feeling good about yourself is to compliment others. This will get you thinking about those around you and help you to transition into healthy conversations.
11. Have Fun
It’s easy to forget to have fun when you’re depressed or have low self-esteem. Plan at least one fun thing to do each week that’s just for you. Try to remember the good feelings you have when you do enjoyable things, and find ways to feel them at other times.
12. Ask Questions
One of the simplest ways to start a conversation is to ask a question. Here are a few to start with:
- How are you?
- Where do you work?
- What’s your major?
- Where are you from?
13. Talk To Someone Every Day
Make it a goal to talk to someone outside of your comfort zone every day.
It doesn’t have to be an in-depth conversation, as long as you’re connecting with someone. It can be a cashier, another parent, the person sitting next to you on the bus, etc.
14. Learn Stuff
People love people who are experts on a lot of things. It’s important to learn new things every day. This will really help your conversation skills.
You could say something like, “I see you’re reading Stephen King’s new
book. I heard him…” Instant conversation starter.
Smiling is probably the easiest thing that you can do to connect with people. It lets people know that you’re a friendly person and makes them want to talk to you. Many times if you simply smile, they will start the conversation.
Making eye contact when you’re talking to someone is important. It lets the other person know that you’re genuinely interested in what they have to say.
This may be hard at first, but try practicing on your loved ones and those you feel comfortable around first.
17. Use less “I” and More “You”
When engaging someone in conversation, try to steer the topic towards the other person as much as you can. People love talking about themselves,
and if all you do is intently listen to others, they will deem you a great conversationalist.
Meditation can be a very effective tool for overcoming shyness and low self-esteem. It involves turning inward and being aware of yourself on that level.
There are many helpful CDs that can guide you through the meditation process.
Relaxation is a great technique that people are using more and more. It especially helps people who are nervous or anxious.
When you find yourself in a stressful social situation, make a conscious effort to relax. No one but you need to know what you’re doing, and it can really help.
Here are some things that you can do:
- Take deep breaths
- Relax your body, one limb at a time.
- Relax your thoughts.
20. TAKE ACTION
Once you’re ready, it’s important to take an active part in overcoming your shyness and low self- esteem. This next set of tips will give you some ideas you can try.
21. Take a Class
It’s always great to learn new things. Putting yourself in a classroom-type the environment will give you lots of social opportunities. Plus, you have an opportunity to excel in something you have an interest in.
23. Take a Walk
Taking a short walk every day can really help you feel good about yourself. If you make it a goal to take a walk every day, rain or shine, it will really help overcome depression.
Find a hobby that you simply can get excited about. Whether it’s painting, golf, singing, or crafts, finding something that you love, and can do on a regular basis, is very important.
25. OTHER HELPS
There are many other helpful things, methods, and ideas out there that can help you overcome shyness and depression. This last set of tips will give you even more tools that you can use.
There are thousands of great self-help books out there specifically designed to guide us into being who we want to be.
27. Keep a Journal
Writing in a journal is a great way to get in touch with who you are. You can also use your journal to set goals and keep track of all the good things
in your life.
Visualization may be a great technique that helps people achieve positive outcomes in their lives. If you’re going on a date, and you’re nervous about it, take a few minutes to visualize yourself on that date.
Picture yourself smiling, having fun, and engaging in great conversation. You’ll be surprised at how much this can help.
29. Reward Accomplishments
While trying to beat your shyness and low self-esteem, make certain to acknowledge and reward even the smallest accomplishments. It doesn’t have to be an enormous reward; a little treat is great.
30. Help Others
Finding a way to help and serve others is very important, especially if you’re trying to overcome depression. Make a goal to find a way to help someone every day, no matter how simple.
31. Make Your Life Pleasurable
Make sure to fill your life with things you like. When doing things, do fun things. Surround yourself with nice people. Play fun music. When looking for employment, look for work that you’ll enjoy doing.
32. No Drugs or Alcohol
Some shy people believe that drugs, especially alcohol, can help them in social situations. This isn’t true. Instead, you’ll become more and more
dependent on alcohol to get you through social situations, all the while your true self never comes out.
33. Be Yourself
In your quest to overcome shyness, low self-esteem, and depression, it is so important that you stay true to yourself. As you do, you’ll learn to love yourself, and so will others.
34. Present Yourself with Confidence ( How to overcome low self-esteem)
A lot of how you feel about yourself is reflected in your appearance. And a large percentage of how others perceive you also come from your body language.
This can include, posture, gestures, facial expressions, and eye movement. That’s why taking care of how you dress in front of others is important.
The point here is not to impress others so much as to feel good about yourself. When you know you look good, you end up feeling good about yourself as well.
Dressing well is much more than donning the trendiest clothes. Instead, it’s all about looking poised and feeling self-assured with a confident posture in any situation.
When putting together, this whole package sends a positive message to others around you.
The expert opinion states that there is a direct correlation between what you wear and what you think of your potential. Looking good and dressed sharp is a powerful way to boost self-confidence.
This little bit of effort goes a long way and as you notice the difference, you can bring your confidence into other areas of your life as well. Even science backs up the idea that dressing well increases performance.
Besides feeling good about yourself, being well-groomed also encourages others to take you seriously.
This means you can make yourself appear more confident based on your clothes alone. A change of wardrobe can help you land the job you want, the deals you want, the recognition you desire, and even the partner you want.
The other important aspect of the presentation is posture. There is a lot of power in posture.
If you tend to slouch, straighten up. If you tend to fold your arms, open them up. Along with dressing events appropriately, your posture and body language say a lot about your confidence levels.
Research shows that when you have a confident posture during an activity, you actually feel more confident.
How you carry yourself speaks volumes about your confidence level. In fact, if you’ve ever paid attention, you’ll see that confident people have a confident walk, with a powerful stride.
They refuse to hide by slumping their shoulders or looking down as they talk. You want to be able to express this body language confidently.
Make a conscious effort to stand tall, talk with your hands, make eye contact, and practice active listening. Engaged body language also uses open gestures, nodding, and smiling. It may even involve mirroring the movements and expressions of others.
This can make you seem not only more confident as you engage in dialogue but also more approachable. When you shake hands, remember that a firm, solid handshake is a universal sign of confidence. Although, make sure that while it’s strong, it’s not crushing.
On the other hand, actions like fidgeting, avoiding eye contact, tapping your foot, or biting nails are all tell-tale signs of nervousness, and uneasy body language.
35. Stop Over Analyzing Situations ( How to overcome low self-esteem)
Many people tend to overthink and overanalyze situations. This means that when they have a great idea, or experience some kind of inspiration, instead of acting on it, they start to break it down bit by bit. However, this kills the inspiration.
Once you start doubting your own inspiration, it’ll become very hard for the idea to materialize. Just think of a time when you had
a great idea, but didn’t speak up. And since you didn’t do it instantly, your brain found a seemingly better reason to quiet you down.
Such second-guessing your every move is perhaps the biggest killer of self-confidence. Keep your doubts in check and make a reality check of all the doubts that you have.
It’s not that every decision has to be quick and without thought, but if you’re indecisive with most of your choices, it will lower your self-confidence. Besides, overthinking leads to negativity.
It has a tendency to twist things around, presenting things to appear much worse than they actually are.
If you want to ask for anything, but feel unsure doing so, you may never actually ask for it. It actually becomes very easy to tie yourself
in knots while overthinking an issue.
Asking may provide you with a simple solution, but doubting yourself you may not feel entitled to even expressing your own preferences.
In most scenarios, overthinking isn’t even connected to the present.
At best, it’s related to the possibility or mere chance of things happening another way. It is the perfect way to lose direction, and along with it, your confidence in yourself.
Typical practices over thinkers engage in include asking the samethe question over and over again, over planning, canceling plans, asking for reassurances, and having a fair bit of trouble making decisions.
In the end, over thinkers either beat themselves over making a mistake or fret about how their decision will impact the future. And along with these distressing thoughts, their confidence
naturally takes a beating as well.
The problem that over-analyzing situations create for confidence levels is that it stresses you out every time you have to make even
the smallest decision.
This makes thinking about big decisions completely unfathomable and you are left with your doubts pinning you down. Also known as “analysis paralysis” this bad habit keeps you from moving forward and never being sure of yourself.
Just remember that confident people don’t always make the right decisions either. But they do make decisions faster than people who are indecisive. This ends up giving them an edge as they know how to improvise and switch directions when needed.
If you are among those who can actually make a decision and stick with it, consider yourself lucky. For others fixating on getting every detail right, becoming confident in their own potential will be a
long way off.
Because the act of over analyzing is one in your head, it makes sense to get it out of your head. So to act confidently, you have to be faster than your doubts.
36. Limit Social Media ( How to overcome low self-esteem)
One of the scariest things to damage confidence is the instinct to compare your life to other people. And there has been enough research done to establish that social media furthers this behavior.
In fact, research shows that about 60% of people report having tainted confidence caused by social media. Such comparisons of other people’s contentment fuels personal insecurities. With social media, impossible standards are set by people who curate their lives and show only the most enviable moments of their life.
These picture-perfect images become the cause of distress for many others beating down on their confidence levels. The comparisons people make on these platforms is often seen as leaving users insecure as if they aren’t able to keep up with others.
Whereas this comparison was once made at family gatherings or in the office, now the same is done via social media in perfectly crafted and duly exaggerated representations of people’s lives. The perfect way to bust anyone’s confidence. While it is fairly natural to measure progress in life, but when done this way, it becomes problematic.
Because now, people compare themselves to perfectly crafted versions of other people. Even though they know that these photos have been engineered with filters and whatnot, they still manage to generate a sense of insecurity in viewers who haven’t yet reached those milestones or hope to do so in the future.
The sad result often is feelings of jealousy or envy that don’t do much to garner confidence. For instance, those with body image issues often feel less happy after spending an hour a day on social media.
Teens have a particularly hard time with their need for validation when they compare themselves with peers who seem to have it all. Up and coming entrepreneurs may see their confidence slacken as the competition seems to have made it while they’re still struggling to get through the door.
On a more general note, the excitement of getting likes and comments on social media becomes highly addictive. If your post doesn’t get the feedback you thought it deserved, you start to doubt yourself. You start to think of what you did wrong- was it not funny enough?
Didn’t you look your best in it? Or was your achievement not as promising as you believed it was? You start to value the opinions of others over your own and any shred of confidence you had when you posted that image/post goes out the door.
Researchers even have self-explanatory names for these phenomena such as “Facebook Depression”, “Self-Promotion Envy Spiral”, and “Social Comparison Theory” where constant comparisons lead to feelings of insecurity, not being good enough in your own life and messing with confidence levels emanate.
The fact of the matter is that there is no true way to feel good about yourself if all you do is spend your time in front of a screen. All the while, real life is happening outside of screens so make sure that you find the time to explore the real world around you.
conclusion ( How to overcome low self-esteem)
We feed our body food to survive on a daily basis, that’s no big surprise. Spiritually we also need to feed our body with love, understanding, and various forms of relaxation and release such as meditation. I strongly encourage you to start your day off with at least five minutes that consists of some type of relaxation exercise.
Either in the morning to kick your day off, the afternoon is you’re able to, or at night before bed, to release the tension that’s build-up throughout your day.
Each week, aim to add roughly five minutes until you end up at an hour daily (if you can). When you do these kinds of things, you further increase your level of wisdom, strength, knowledge, and confidence.
By having a higher level of strength you’ll begin to feel as though you can conquer the world. This, as a result, will also help to decrease your level of stress that you face.
Once you’ve accepted yourself, you can begin to cope with the world around you and further accept the fact that you can do everything you’re “expected” to do in life. Nevertheless, to accept that, you first have to love who you are and be proud of the person that you’ve become.
There are so many things in life that you’re beyond capable of doing, however first you must develop the motivation and the mental willpower to get out there and just DO THEM. With that said, I want to thank you for taking the time to go through this brief but hopefully informative course.
I hope that you’ve taken away a fair bit of insight about self-esteem and now you’re better able to build your confidence in your own life to achieve success and greatness.
Best of luck on your journey to self-fulfillment, and always remember that you’re a unique and awesome individual.